Failure update.

It’s been awhile since I posted, I fell off the wagon hard. I’ve gained back 20lbs of progress and I’m pretty disappointed about it. I only have myself to blame for my food choices and lack of exercise. Tonight, I’ll get back on the bike for the first time in 3 weeks. In those 3 weeks, I’ve gained about 15lbs of my weight back because I chose to drink soda again, and eat like I was dying tomorrow. My energy levels are lower and I feel like crap because of it. In the middle of it all, I ended up getting shingles and having to deal with all that entails. Today I’ve started back on the no added sugars kick and staying in the ballpark of 1200 calories total intake. I’ve had some call outs on why I’m blogging and how dumb it is. I’ve come to realize that blogging helps me keep myself accountable for my poor choices by making me write out and acknowledge things I’ve done that I might just let slip past if I don’t write it out.

 

Today so far, I’ve consumed 230 calories, tonight I will ride the bike and eat with friends at a Mexican restaurant while attempting to keep the calories in check. I was going to attempt ketosis and may still keep some of that diet in my current food intake reorganization. In 2015, I stuck to a calorie counting, cycling regimen and dropped down to 200lbs a number I haven’t seen since high school. That worked for me and I believe it will work again. I’m working with the evidence in front of me. The scale currently states 243lbs and I’m hoping to be under 200lbs by spring. I have a gym membership and I know how to do cardio, I’d welcome any input on how to incorporate weights without destroying myself. I honestly have no clue what I’m doing with weights or on a machine. I’ve tried the trainer bit but was tossed around to multiple different trainers who really weren’t much more qualified than myself, asking questions like what do you want to do next, or how much do you think we should do. It was essentially paying someone to follow me around and hold my hand. I remember back in middle school and early high school when I was in sports (sorry golf but you don’t do much for my waistline) and was really in the best shape of my life. I attribute that to the drill sergeant-like instruction I received. Someone to be that literal voice yelling at me and motivating me to give my max effort every time and leaning me out in the process. At this stage, the bike is probably my best weapon as I’m too heavy for my knees to except any sort of prolonged running activity although I think it would be pretty awesome to run a 5k in a time that was actually semi-competitive in a top 1000 of my age group!  I don’t particularly care to swim so that kind of activity is likely out. When it comes down to it I need to find someone in a similar situation as I, someone to compete against. I’m a competitive person in nature and feed off of the word can’t. I’ve always said that the worst thing you can tell me is it can’t be done. I’ll try like hell to make it happen. If you are in the need of the competition or want to come yell at me at the gym be my guest. You know how to get ahold of me. 

 

I don't want to come across as I sat on my butt the entire time I gained the weight. I did get a few things done during that time. I caught up on side work, built a pantry, helped Marisa redo the kitchen until we are ready to take it down to studs, completed an 18-month photo session of Emma, redid some trim on the house, and with the help of my father-in-law painted the south facing trim white.